If a person spends much time watching television, one could quickly come to the conclusion that the average American is constantly in great pain. In addition, people are bombarded daily on TV and the internet with an onslaught of potential diseases, allergies, disorders and syndromes. I was in a good mood the other day watching my favorite show a Gilligan’s Island rerun when a commercial came on that showed an old man, I mean a really old man, trying to teach his grandson how to fly a kite. As I watched I was trying to figure out what was being advertised (wind generation, dietary fiber, hemorriod cream) and the announcer said, “Aren’t there enough reason in your life to talk to your doctor about Lipicore.
The announcer didn’t say what Lipicore actually was, but the name sounded like the evil emperor from the planet of the clay men. So, I sat there and instead of enjoying my favorite show watching Gilligan’s madcap adventures, I was wondering why I hadn’t talked to my doctor about Lipicore. All of these types of drug ads, and there are waaaaay too many for my taste, say to tell your doctor about all the medicines you take before you use the drug. My feeling is if you have to tell your doctor about the medicines you’re taking, you better get a different doctor. Is it any wonder that many Americans become hypochondriacs? All this has led to a nation that is highly reliant on drugs.
Television has become infested with commercials for drugs we have to ask our doctors about. These commercials start out trying to scare you with something like, “You might be one of 400 million Americans who are suffering from Dysfunctional Frenal Syndrome, ask your doctor now about Parmacril before it’s too late. At that point you’re starting to get angry at your doctor for not alerting you to the dangers of a Frenal Syndrome attack.
Just then the announcer tells you of the side effects of Parmacril.
“In some patients Parmacril can cause headaches and a growth of an extra limb out of the neck area. In rare cases some users have turned into a Leper. Do not use Parmacril if you are now taking or have recently said hello to anyone taking Zocor, Marvacal, Lavadil, Givadam, or Clamalama Ding Dong. Discontinue use if your eyes become the size of croquet balls or hair starts to grow on your tongue.
So basically this ad says, 1) you must purchase and take this drug, 2) you’ll wish you hadn’t.
Some patients say they have severe memory loss from using these types of drugs. I personally long for the days when I wasn’t so informed about all the diseases in the world and there were just Bayer Asprin commercials that interrupted my favorite show. Just a second, I forgot, what was it? Oh yes, my favorite show McHale’s Navy reruns.